I didn’t like the Suckerpunch movie. There, I’ve said it.

Okay, now that that piece of unpleasantness is out of the way, let me tell you what *actually* made my Thursday night instead of film… it was the three-pointed attack from the trinity of hot clothing consumption in East Vancouver. Namely Lace Embrace, Scout Boutique, and Trunk Show. Melanie, from Lace Embrace had been a HUGE contribution to the film, designing corsets for the principals as well as for the cabaret sequences. To celebrate the launch of the film she made this amazing collection and invited two of her couture-loving gal pals (Corinne and Misty) to join her in making a landmark fashion show at the Rio Theatre. Trust me, it had me rubbing my eyes so often I need a new pair of contacts now. It was that hot. Yes, yes it was.

So, as much as I’ve been living in corsets for the last three weeks, after seeing everyone dressed in this collection I am far from bored of them. FAR from it. I was worried I may have overloaded my circuits, but that’s not the case. I think that I have gotten even more mildly obsessed with them and even found myself fidgeting during the movie, tightening it and loosening the strings just to play with it and see how much smaller I could reduce my waist by the end of the film. If any of you are waist training out there and have some time on your hands it’s a fun way to goof off. Just sayin’. But watching the models all milling around in the show stoppers looking like they fell out of some crazy fantasy of Mr.Pearl’s head was inciting me to train harder. If I had that much difficulty holding myself back from tackling my own friends in a fit of abandon, I can only imagine how hard it was for everyone else to behave. Thankfully, there were no incidents.

The evening was hosted by East Vanity Parlour’s own Mamma K, who looked like Mae West, though unlike the old school dropped a few sass-bombs like referring to Misty Greer as ‘that vagazzled minx’. I have pains of love inside for the both of them, Mamma K for referencing that and Misty for actually being vagazzled.

*NOTE: Your vocabulary word of the day is ‘Vagazzled’. It refers to the application of Swarovski crystals to a waxed portion of the female anatomy to decorate it, a la Erte. Right up there with the invention of the wheel, fire, and fake lashes, kids.

So the full on force of the night was felt by the fashion show for me. The film itself had a hard time holding a candle to the raging fire that the actual show was, but between the outfits, the models, the visual presentations (two sick music videos – amazing!) it was definitely a good prep for Vancouver Fashion Week.

Oh, and by the way VFW, get ready to get a big, sparkly bitchslap. That’s right, you heard me. It’s going to go DOWN when you see the LEA collection on the runway for this season. None of this deconstructed, flowly pre-distressed nightmares. Seriously, if sloppy gets even more fashionable, I’m going to start wearing a ballgown to work to bring balance to the fashion force. Or just holding down all the hipster chicks and giving them hot porno-actress hair, stockings and high heels. All this Annie Hall shit has got to go. Just sayin’… thank goodness Melanie has her girls here to help represent (Virgina, Erin, I’m looking in your directions).

In closing, enjoy the Corset Fete at Sin City tonight, cinch those waists in, see you perhaps at Haus Of Boudior for our salon, and let’s all get elegantly waisted tonight.

Little Miss Risk

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